Updates

We lost all insurance with Raj's termination from Allstate 4/1, so I'm trying to figure out COBRA and Medicare (Raj is eligible 6/1). CitiMortgage accepted a short sale on Dave's house, so Mom and I have been feverishly trying to clear decades worth of STUFF (including a lot from their parents' place) out of the house we provided for my BIL. The new owner takes possession with the closing, scheduled for Thursday, 4/21.

Just Stuff

The kids and I had a nice Spring Break in Orlando, where we got to see my sister & her husband. And it was wonderful to have my aunts drive down to see Mom and us for a long weekend after that. Raj's PCP decided he had to SEE him to change a prescription, so I had to coordinate paid transport to/from St. Alexius & copay over the phone during our return travel Thursday. I'm also discouraged about Raj's inpatient stay at Rush University Hospital. They ruled out epilepsy, then scheduled him for many new tests, all with gastro-specialists at Rush (similar to tests he's had the past 11 years), and we lose medical insurance April 1. Raj will have access to Medicare health insurance June 1, but I'm going to have to wait for COBRA paperwork to come so I can review possibilities for the girls and me. I'm dreading the Rush and Medicar bills, especially since Raj just broke another filling.

Rush

Raj has been an inpatient at Rush (downtown) since Monday. He's had several tests to possibly diagnose epilepsy or narcolepsy for when he loses consciousness. It would be nice to have additional information on what happens during his "events" to prevent or somehow improve his quality of life.

Today was supposed to be an FHA appraisal on Dave's house, since CitiMortgage accepted a short sale offer from an FHA buyer. I contracted with an estate sales company to sell as much stuff out of the house as possible, on consignment, and hope to pay for cleaning out the rest with those proceeds.

Updates

Raj had another fall on Feb. 20, which resulted in a bruise on his back; otherwise, OK. CitiMortgage refuses to accept any offer less than $155K for Dave's house, and by some miracle, offers keep coming. I haven't found a way to coordinate cleaning it out - especially without heat & plumbing. Unexpected expenses (snow service not showing up after the blizzard, then threatening to sue me for payment anyway; washer broke; Raj and Ruth both chipped teeth; I needed a biopsy) have really made finances tough. Sunrise, where Raj resides, also increased costs, although our disability income remains the same.

The Line of Credit against the land is due this spring, when Raj is being terminated from Allstate. Unfortunately, in 2 years none of the investments have recovered, and I can't wait any more; I sold the last of the Estate to pay off the Line, and will need a miracle to pay the taxes and insurance point forward! Medicare doesn't start for Raj until 6/1, so I'm not sure what we'll use for medical (for Raj, nor for the rest of us), since COBRA for all 4 of us will probably be too costly.

Falls

Raj is having a harder time covering up his falls. Without full sensation in his extremities, he doesn't always recognize the extent of his injuries; So I'm glad the staff at Sunrise at least check him out each time he falls, and let me know most of the time. Saturday was the first time he fell twice in one day (that he will admit to!), and Monday he fell again - all involved scrapes and bruises, but he doesn't seem bothered at all by the injuries, and none of the recent falls necessitated a trip to the hospital. Sunday, I brought him home to enjoy the SuperBowl with us, and thankfully, he didn't fall here!

Jerome

Raj lost a friend from Sunrise yesterday, Jerome, and he was with him when he died at Alexian Brothers. Raj is sad, and he will really miss him. It's interesting to observe him amid this loss, because he actually had a relationship with Jerome, and this is not common. Even when "well" in the medical sense of the word, I rarely saw Raj reach out to "be there" for another. It's not that I think he's completely selfish, but that he never had much practice being a friend, pretty clueless in the "giving" part but well-versed in the "taking"; As a spouse, he simply stated what he needed/wanted and if it was within my ability, I provided it. When life would get me down, Raj was more like a coach that would tell me to get back in the game, rather than a comforter or listener. I assume his buddies and coworkers had the same experience. He called it "Rajian Physics" - the way everything worked out in his favor, all the time. Anyway, I'm grateful to Jerome for bringing out a different side of Raj, for giving him the opportunity to BE a friend.

Christmas review +

Looking back over Christmas, I can't believe how relaxing and low-stress things were without having to walk on eggshells and cater to every preference of a demanding Dave. We had Raj home for opening gifts on Christmas Eve, and enjoyed some much-appreciated downtime the rest of the kids' break.

Raj fell into the bathroom door of his suite at Sunrise while walking around eating chocolate in the middle of the night recently, but didn't get checked out since he said he wasn't injured. At least there is less wandering at night, because he's been using his C-PAP machine for his sleep apnea (3 weeks now!), and he's actually well-rested. The down side (more for me than anyone else) is that he's awake during the day, calling with multiple requests. And without a sense of priority, he may or may not tell me about falling or running out of meds, while requesting a particular shirt 10 or 20 times!

In the meantime, there have been 2 offers on Dave's house - $120K, which CitiMortgage countered with $155K and the buyer backed out; then $100K cash, which we can't even present to Citi because they've already set their price. Selling prices continue to fall, and now interest rates have started to go up. I don't know what the bank negotiator is thinking.