Memory

The thing that sucks about memory disorders is that you have to walk on eggshells around people with them 24/7.  It's exhausting for the loved ones (I know), and I would imagine it's even more exhausting for those going through it.  It's typical for memory loss sufferers to lash out in anger and frustration, often the opposite of their natural personality/temperment.  My husband's progression has gone so slowly that he's adjusted, with the help of medication and assisted living, so most days he's pretty stable -  but it's taken 5 years.  Unfortunately, I'm not able to apply all this knowledge and experience to anyone else.  Raj's mom, for example, was typical - very angry and depressed, even violent at times - leading up to her diagnosis; but we didn't know that was common behavior back then for someone suffering memory loss.  My grandparents, from what I remember, were atypical - cooperative, calm, trusting - as they aged and their memories worsened.

So how do you deal with memory loss in another?  What if they can't see their changes in behavior or don't recognize their symptoms of depression?  What if they truly believe everyone else is wrong, and their paranoia gets projected back out at the world?  How do you express concern or love?  How do you explain it to children?  I really don't know.  All I can do is turn to my faith, pray for patience and discernment.

I try to see things through their eyes, so when my memory fails, I won't put my loved ones through the "walking on eggshells" that seems so cruel.